Little kids meet one another and, within about thirty seconds, they know if they are going to be friends. They may even play together for hours at a playground or birthday party and not know one another’s names. Also, they may look for that friend every time they go back to that same park, but their day-to-day lives are no worse if they never see the other child again.

Developmentally, friendships are at their most important and influential stage during the adolescent years. It is critical to development that young people begin to differentiate themselves from their parents or primary guardians, but because they still need support and guidance, they turn to their friends.

One of the greatest challenges of friendships as we age is their fluidity. Even lifelong best friends can struggle to keep in touch through college, marriage, kids, new jobs, and relocation. Having a best friend and being a best friend can be wonderful, but it also can be difficult.

While friendships at all ages and stages change, one relationship remains the same. You can relate to God according to whatever role works for you. For some, God is a parent. For some, Jesus is a best friend. For others, the Holy Spirit is a guide and guardian. Use whatever label makes the Holy Trinity accessible and understandable to you, and remember that the label that defines you is “child of God.”

Being a best friend isn’t about labels, resources, or gifts.

It’s about being present for the person in a time of need.